“Just one hundred percent correct in my body”

I was surprised, you know? I saw the ultrasound. I knew I was pregnant. I was getting bigger.  I knew I had to fit into like these other clothes.  And then, still.. when I was in the delivery room – and I look down and there’s actually a person coming out of me.. and I’m like “Woah, woaah I’m really pregnant. Wow, that really happened! God, oh my God!”. And so, it really didnt occur to me that  it was actually happening to me, I was me looking at this other person being pregnant and handling it by a remote control in some other control room some where. It was really… yeah

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That is the only time in my whole life when Ive felt right in my body. When I was pregnant and nursing. I nursed for almost nine months, I would have nursed for a year.. as long as she wanted – but that, uhm.. my body was doing what it was supposed to be doing, it was doing it by itself and it felt absolutely right and that was the only time in my life when I for about a year  of feeling really, realy right in my body. Just one hundred percent correct in my body.

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….And I was very clear that there was men in my life who said to me “I’m really jealous, I wish I could have my own kid!”. And I think that, uhm.. it was nice for them to sorta get to see some parts of that in day to day life as being my friends. That they didnt necessarily get to see because they didnt have pregnant people in their lives or automatic distance with a pregnant woman because they assume that they are not going to understand. I was like “well..you know there’s no great big secret..excuse me I have to go barf”. It was nothing glamorous or..so it was to find the men in my life who really, really were supportive in me trying to have a kid.

From the movie “Transparent: the movie” by Jules Rosskam. Of course the entire movie is very interesting, but I especially like these quotes. I’m glad I bought it.

Other interesting (Swedish) blogs about transgender, gender roles, giving birth, pregnancy, movies, parents, families